Rest in Peace

Last Friday Schatz and I flew to England for a long weekend, coming back to DUS yesterday.  The “main event” was to visit my Dad’s grave, as I was in hospital here in Germany when he was buried.  In truth, I probably would not have attended his funeral, sad to admit.

In the days before our visit, for Schatz came with me, I had printed out:

  • The Lord’s Prayer in English
  • The Lord’s Prayer in Germany
  • The Lord’s My Shepherd
  • A plan of the cemetery

We turned up in ideal cemetery visiting weather: dull and overcast, with drizzle.  I brought my printouts.  I had forgotten to call at the florist en route to pick up a bunch of flowers for the grave.

 

To paraphrase Julius Caeser, I came, I saw, I… felt nothing much.   By referencing to other graves that had stones on, I found my Dad’s grave within five minutes of arrival.  It was non-descript.  No gravestone.  (There never, ever will be one for him.)  No wreath, no bouquet – either removed after so many days, or maybe, sad to say, stolen by local chavs.  Just broken earth.  It didn’t really look like a grave to trigger the “time to let British stiff upper lip wobble.”

Schatz went and grabbed three daffodils quietly from a corner of the cemetery.  She placed them on the grave.

I had kept my promise to my Dad last autumn that we would definitely come to visit him in April this year.  I just hadn’t anticipated under these circumstances.

We prayed at the foot of his anonymous grave.  I discreetly photographed his grave.  He has a picturesque view of the Yorkshire Moors.

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It started to drizzle more.  I looked Schatz in the eye.  We nodded.  It was time.  We left the cemetery and headed back to the main road to get ready to head to Whitby for the fun part of the weekend.

No tears.  No emotion.  No numbness.

I came, I saw, I departed.

Have a closure-filled day, won’t you!

 

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Birthday Nostalgia

So, last week was my birthday: 21 again, and more.

Where was I on that day of the year…?

  • 10 years ago: Doing pgce teacher training in Middlesbrough.  Not my cup of tea.  Ler’s just leave it at that.
  • 20 years ago: Started my first ever permanent job, working in the International Programme Liaison team at Mercury Communications Ltd.  I did a lot of telecoms courses in that year.
  • 30 years ago: At sixth form college in Middesbrough, re-sitting my O-levels.  That was where I started studying Russian.
  • 40 years ago: At Wolfenbüttel Primary School, near the East-West German border, being sent to the headmaster’s office to take a phone call from my Dad, then stationed at HMP Maze, Northern Ireland, to wish me happy birthday.

Have a nostalgic day, won’t you!

Radio – My Best Friend

Desert Island Discs: what items would I bring?  I can’t give you a comprehensive list, but I do know which luxury item I would bring: a radio.

I’ve always loved the radio.  My relationship with the radio goes back to the mid-70’s as a pads brat in Germany, listening to BFBS radio.  (As an  aside, besides the target audience of British service personnel and their dependents, millions of West Germans, East Germans, Poles and Dutch used to tune in.)  As for German TV, I never watched much, just Biene Maja cartoon series, Pippi Longstocking and The Muppet Show dubbed in German.  Instead, I used to listen to Dad’s Army. the yes-no game and Badger Bill.

If you haven’t heard of Biene Maja, Pippi Longstocking, or Badger Bill, you were never a pads brat in Germany.  Punkt.

When I was ten, my birthday present from parents was a transistor radio, not much bigger than my ten-year-old fist, with FM and MW.  I used to listen to the evening football and fall asleep, my radio on quiet, crackling as MW does, under my pillow.  Even at the age of ten, I was into news and current affairs, so I often used to listen to BBC World Service on crackly MW.  Even now, just thinking of it, I have that “Ohrwurm”, Liliburlero, running through my head.

Fast forward to sixteen and sixth-form days.  More late-night radio.  Nightowls phone-in show on Metro FM from Newcastle.  Scores of Geordies ringing up to say,

“I’m a first-time caller, so I’m a little bit nervous.”

All addictive stuff when you’re at sixth form, listening to Geordies:

  • moaning about their dole money being stopped because they’ve been working
  • calling for national service, capital punishment and the birch to be brought back
  • screaming for all immigration to be stopped forthwith with and for “them” to be sent back “to their own country”, etc

Listening to the show years later, I just thought “pub bores’R’us.”  Tastes change as we grow older.

Fast forward to my year abroad in the USSR/Russia, 1991-1992.  A ghetto-blaster, with tape recorder and:

  • FM
  • MW
  • LW
  • SW

I tried all the frequencies.  Local radio was sleep-inducing in Voronezh.  My fellow year-abroaders in Moscow had a far bigger choice of stations.  I gravitated to SW.  I discovered:

  • All-India radio (yawn…)
  • Radio Pyongyang (fascinating hearing about all the achievements under Kim-il Sung)
  • BBC World Service (decent signal was only there from 11pm till 4am)

A few mornings with bags under the eyes after listening to BBC during the weee small hours, when the reception was crystal-clear, without crackle and hiss trampling the news.

I remember writing in my diary during my year abroad:

Things I miss. from the UK

  1. Radio 4
  2. The newspapers

Fast forward to 1993-1994 and bedsit (WG) days in Saltburn, living on the breadline.  My fortnight treat: a copy of Private Eye magazine.  Entertainment: the radio, especially BBC North, where the late-night show presenter would finish off by wishing listeners:

“A very good night to you, especially if you are alone tonight.”

Fast-forward to today.  Praise be to internet radio.  I can pick up so many stations on my Kindle.

  • BBC World Service
  • BBC Radio 4
  • BBC Radio 5
  • Falkland Islands Radio Service (come on, you know you want to!)
  • BBC Radio Tees

Since moving to Germany I’ve made a point of listening to Radio Tees, especially the Sunday morning God-slot show, emailing the presenter and having my mails read out.  (I am one of The International Contingent, together with Kim in Arizona and Bill in Seattle.)

Do I want a pet dog as companion?  No, I think it has to be a radio – even after all these years.

Having a radiant day, won’t you!

Friday Punfest

Continuing the theme of Ali’s headline challenge, I thought the following thread on Facebook was too good NOT to share.

Take a look at this picture.

Carpet

This was taken on the hills, near Eston Nab, a local beauty spot in North-East England.  Who in their tiny mind goes around nailing ripped carpet to trees in a beauty spot?

Then the puns started…

Ginge in Germany: Whoever did that needs a good telling-off, a good carpeting.

Heather: Those rugs would better suit Donald trump than a tree.

David A: Are they Wilton ?

Craig Pancrack: Quality wit on the board tonight !

Ginge in Germany: I thought you’d think it was a “pile” of rubbish…

Ray: imbeciles from Franks Factory Flooring?

Ginge in Germany: Well, the culprits certainly do want flooring.

Kieron: I guess they just ‘felt’ like doing it

Craig Pancrack ‘Tacky’…

Paul B: Weres speedy gonzalas ?

Ginge in Germany: Underlay in this being reported is shocking. Let’s hope we nail the folks who did it.

Paul B: Tacked

Ginge in Germany: Have the Gazette been contacted about this, or will they just want to sweep it under the carpet?

Andrea: Will you lot get a grip!

Ginge in Germany: There must have been witnesses. The perpetrators would have received lots of “stairs” off people.

Ginge in Germany: Are the police underlay to the scene?

Kieron: Crime investigators are going up there tomorrow, so expect this area to be ( double-sided) taped off.

Ginge in Germany: Blame the outsiders, carpet-baggers.

Russ: Maybe there’s an underlaying problem here.

Seán: Tree Ruggers no doubt

Craig Pancrack: Carpet burns next time the hills are set on fire…

Ginge in Germany: I’ve heard the culprits headed off in a vehicle, in their car, pet.

Ginge in Germany: No point in skirting around this issue. Something must be done.

Ginge in Germany: Maybe drink played a roll in it.

Ginge in Germany: I know some people like to go up Eston Nab for a good shag, but that’s taking it a bit far.

Ginge in Germany: Well, this has been an entertaining yarn.

Kieron Moore The dyed in the wool members would snap them up

Ginge in Germany: This would have pleased Ali Brownlee on his BBC Tees headline challenge.

Ginge in Germany: We should walk over the people who did this. Do I have everyone’s backing on this?

Paul: All woven together

Ginge in Germany: Send a cable to the Gazette.

Paul B: Just looking there there might just be enough for me tortoise box!!

Ginge in Germany: That’s tortoise another use for the carpet.

Ginge in Germany: I see no snags in re-using that carpet.

Ginge in Germany: Well, yarn know, I enjoyed it. There could be worsted things to do. Were the carpets made of polyEston?

Julie: I’m guessing ‘swatches’ ??

Kieron Moore MAM, I need some carpet in me bedroom, the floorboards are cold! ..’Shut up Tyson.. carpets don’t grow on trees’

Ginge in Germany: Too tuft to be sure. Best to tread carefully.

Ginge in Germany: I’ve found out who did it. What’s your mobile number? I’ll need to texture.

Craig Pancrack: no end to the thread ! (pun intended!)

Ginge in Germany: This has got me in stitches.

Ginge in Germany: Well, I think weave had a good bit of fun tonight. Let’s keep everyone grinning. Now I’ll double back to bed.

Paul B: The trees are piling up.

Vinny C: Come on get a GRIP

Ginge in Germany: I think any plan to catch whoever did this is fundamentally floored.

Paul Bradley Rolling rolling rolling keep those carpets rolling shag piiiillllle!!!!

Tracey: They have no imagination, I could’ve made a cat scratch pole with that carpet.

Paul B: Give the fitters a break they where trying to give the tree some cover from the frost

Paul B: I think it was of a roll end….the cuts were a bit rough

Andrea: Think this Storey’s been done to death.

Ginge in Germany: Allied about that. Alack and Dallas, the puns are still rolling.

Neil S: This thread is getting thread bare ……

Ginge in Germany: Maybe someone wanted the hills to look rugged?

Barbara B: All this as left me a bit frayed

Ginge in Germany: Barbara B, I think we’ve got everything covered now. Those going to bed can lino-ing all is good.

Have a pun-packed day, won’t you!

Make the punishment fit the crime

Lindsay Sandiford.  You may have heard of her.  Maybe not.  Presently she is on death row in an Indonesian prison for drug smuggling.

Quite an interesting case.  Even the prosecution did not ask for the death penalty, “just” (ISTR) fifteen (15) years’ prison sentence.  She says she did the smuggling because she had received threats against members of her family.  She was also at one time a nuisance neighbour when living in Cheltenham some years ago.  Thus, notwithstanding the Evening Gazette newspaper description of  her as a grandmother (and therefore cute and cuddly?), she has not endeared her to the British public.

http://www.gazettelive.co.uk/news/foreign-office-visit-lindsay-sandiford-8759919

Personally, I don’t know if she had received threats against her family.  I wasn’t there to see if it happened or not.  I just believe that the death penalty should never be applied, regardless of how heinous the crime committed.  Killing her will not bring anyone back who’s been killed by the evils of drug addiction, or their victims in turn.  I don’t believe it will have a deterrent effect on potential smugglers.

The death penalty is barbaric.

Have a merciful day, won’t you!

Reasons to be cheerful

Yes, I was a fan of Ian Dury, in case you have that earworm ringing in your head.

Reasons to be cheerful today:

  1. While sitting in the Johanniskirche in DUS this evening, I lit a votive candle and asked God to give me hope on the job front.  Twenty minutes later, I switched my mobile on.  Missed call.  Rang the number back.  “Herr GermanGinge, we’d like to invite you to an interview next Tuesday.  Is that ok?”  Oh yes!
  2. I found out that my Facebook friend, TeesPride, is making a good recovery from cancer, receiving very positive news from her specialist today.  Result!

Have a cheerful day, won’t you!

Sunray down – not long now

So, the latest sitrep on Sunray (from A1 source, for those of you familar with G2 terminology) does not make pleasant reading.

His house:

  • Stinks of stale urine
  • Has empty bottles of whisky everywhere
  • Has empty packets of Benson & Hedges lying everwhere

Sunray:

  • Is dirty, unkempt and unwashed
    • Hard to believe that we are talking about an ex-22-year SNCO of the British Army
  • Has been banned from three pharmacies in his area due to his “anger management issues”
    • Losing his temper like a two-year-old not getting his favourite sweets in the supermarket because the shop assistant took ten minutes to process his prescription:
      • Find his tablets
      • Count them
      • Get them checked out by the dispenser and pharmacist
      • Hand them over to him

Am I beyond caring?  No.

Am I beyond worrying?  Yes.  I can do no more to help him.  Yes, I could:

  • Fly over on the next available flight from Düsseldorf to Teesside
  • Sit with him 24/7 (“I’m a lonely old man.”)
  • Keep him company, listen to “all his war stories” (insert barracks name, rank and unit to create a Sunray war story, eg:

    At Osnabrück in 1964 this WO2 in the Green Jackets…

and still achieve nothing.  Instead, I’d be employed as his gopher (“go for this, go for that”) all hours of the day to nip down to the shop and get his daily fix of intoxicating liquor.

His catchphrase the morning after the night before is:

I am NEVER, EVER drinking again.

One day, probably within weeks, not months, he’ll stick to that promise.  When he dies.

Meanwhile, life goes on for the rest of planet Earth, including his offspring.

Have a sober day, won’t you!