Pack Your Swimming Trunks is the title of a German-language song from the 1950s. Last weekend Schatz and I did not need to pack them.
We decided to spend Saturday, a glorious, sunny, day (28 degrees celsius) at Unterbacher See, a beauty spot to the south of Düsseldorf. Specifically, the south beach, where the FKK (naturist/nudist/au naturel) section is to be found.
I had been two or three times before, and I liked it. Clear water in the lake, very friendly people. Schatz had seen some of my pictures from Unterbacher See. She had visited its website. She, too, wanted to try the place out.
G in G:
Schatz, are you sure you’re happy to go to the FKK section?
Yeah, what’s the big deal? I’ve sat in the Tecaldarium sauna before. No problem at all to go there.
G in G:
Fair enough. Let’s do it then.
One hour and €4 each later we arrive at Unterbacher See.
G in G, you will need to wear one thing here.
G in G:
Yes, and your hat.
We reach the FKK area. Schatz picks a suitable spot in a slightly shaded area next to a row of trees.
We drop off our things. Towel, goggles… clothes.
All of them. Every. Single. Piece. (Except for my hat, of course.)
Schatz gets undressed as casually if she were about to jump into the shower, totally un-bothered about being in her birthday suit (Adamskostüm) with what seems to be half the population of Düsseldorf. (Well, let’s just say, hundreds of people there. But only one redhead there – namely, me, Ginge in Germany.)
We both lie down on our beach towels, pretty much oblivious to all the other birthday suits surrounding us. Schatz rolls over. I spray sun cream over her body from head to foot.
Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr! Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr! Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!
The sun cream is a bit cold. Probably not a bad thing when it’s nearly 30oc. One side, then the other. (Now Schatz has a good idea how it is to be a rotisserie chicken.)
Schatz gets her e-book out and starts reading as if she were on her living room couch. I do the same with my book on Russian grammar… as one does.
After a few pages, Schatz suggests going for a (skinny) dip in the lake. We go ankle-deep. It’s slightly cold. By no means a complaint. It’s what you need. Schatz is the first to immerse herself in the water. Like a coward, I walk into the water up to my armpits. I then take the plunge. Literally.
Whoooooar! That is nice and cooling. Good job we have waterproof sun cream on. We swim for a good twenty minutes. It’s too nice to come back to dry land. Sailing boats and kayaks cruise by, waving to the people in their
bathing birthday suits. The bathing birthday suits wave back.
Schatz comes back to our spot, borrows my rucksack to use as a pillow, rolls over and has a power nap. I read my Russian grammar book. Schatz is happy and content.
So, overall impression?
- There is nothing at all erotic about an FKK beach. If getting a thrill from naked flesh is your “thang,” then visit the internet, not the FKK beach.
- Everybody there had body confidence. There were people of all shapes and sizes there, from pensioners to single people, to families with children of all ages, all happily lying there or strolling around.
- One thing: piercings. Let’s just say, why would you want to place a bumper sticker on Ferrrari? Why? Why? Why?
- Nobody stares at you, not even at the only redhead there. They’re all either reading their newspaper (handy in lieu of sun cream, I guess), their e-reader, or their Russian grammar book.
- There is nothing as nice and as cooling as swimming au naturel in the lake (temperature: 21oc).
- Schatz loved the place. She was happy to lie there without any clothes – or the slightest hint of embarrassment.
- She loved the coffee and the bratwurst at the snack kiosk.
- Schatz herself actually mentioned there were no posers in the FKK section, but there were lots of them in the non-FKK section, preening themselves, worrying about their looks, planning the next bleaching of their nasal hair, etc.
- We both plan to go again. Next time I will plunge straight into the water, and not just tip-toe up to my shoulders and shiver. Just take the plunge – literally.
- From a health point of view, we both got our daily dose of vitamin D and no sunburn. Bingo!
Have a textilfrei day, won’t you!