On the Pious and Glorious Twelfth

Today is the Pious and Glorious Twelfth of July, on which the Laurel and Hardy Fan Club Orange Loyalists parade in their bowler hats to celebrate Good King Billy’s victory many years ago.

bowlers

To mark the occasion, I bought my mate from East Belfast a wee rubber ball. Every time it bounces on the ground, it goes, “Boyne! Boyne! Boyne!”

Have a bouncy day, won’t you!

 

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Machmallauter: Boney M

I was always a fan of of Boney M.  I had no choice really.  When I was pads brat living in Wolfenbüttel, Germany 1975-78, their music was on BFBS all the time.  Every hour.  Every day.

This was my favourite Boney M number: 137, to be exact.  Psalm 137, otherwise known as…

By the Rivers of Babylon

Have a psalmodic day, won’t you!

Machmallauter! Eurovision

The Eurovision Song Contest is on TV this Saturday.  I’ll be cleaning my toenails… alphabetising my CD collection… just unavailable for TV watching.

As far as I’m concerned, Eurovision went downhill after Nicole and A Little Peace Bucks Fizz and Making Your Mind Up Johnny Logan and What’s Another Year… no, hang on.  It’s been 42 years since there was ever a good, get ’em on the dance floor, song on Eurovision…

Enjoy!

Have a brotherly day, won’t you!

Machmallauter!

I have catholic (little C – take note) musical tastes – everything from classical like Mozart to AC/DC to ZZ Top.  This morning I heard an old, recycled joke.

Q. What’s the difference between 1990s USA and today’s USA?

A. 1990’s USA had Bill Clinton, Bob Hope, Johnny Cash and Stevie Wonder.  Now it has Donald Trump, no cash, no hope, and no flippin’ wonder!

Then I looked up Johnny Cash’s biggest hits, one of which is below.  Stick your big headphones on and listen to this ‘un!

Have a Cash-rich day, won’t you!

Ex-Pat Life

As a pad’s brat, I’ve been around the world, and also as an adult.  My first ever “proper” graduate job brought me to Bangkok, Thailand, for three months training back in 1995.

BKK is notorious for many things.  The bars.  Their “live entertainment” is somewhat more interesting than bingo, karoake and stand-up comics.  Watch Spalding Grey’s monologue, Swimming to Cambodia if you want to enjoy an analysis of Thailand, filled with dry, dark humour.

I spent my first Saturday in BKK with Brij, a new Indian colleague.  We were down one of the go-go bars of Soi Cowboy (“Soi” being Thai for “alley”).  Brij was by now getting rather “friendly” with one of the staff.

Ginge in Germany:

Er, Brij, I think that’s a lady boy.  They have a rather large Adam’s apple.

Brij, hand over “barmaid’s” chest:

No, don’t be silly.  She’s got a great pair here.

Ginge in Germany:

Yeah, but I think he’s also got a great pair down below…

Brij, hand sliding down somewhat lower:

Rubbish… she’s definitely a… ermmmm… er…

Now, to Brij I dedicate this fine Bee Gees hit.

Have a ladylike day, won’t you!