Sunray. His children used to call him “Dad.” His daughter nowadays calls him “the sperm-donor.” He’s been a “problem child” all his married life and in the years thereafter. Serial borrower. Serial non-payer-back.
Heavy drinker. Alcoholic. Serial nuisance caller, trawling his address book for people to phone up to fifteen times a day. Serial texter. “U R ME PAL”; “CUM N SEE ME”; “GET ME A BTL OF ROSE PLS”.
I used to write to him every week or two, either a proper type-written letter or a postcard to boost his morale. I used to phone him once a month. Has he ever written back? Once this year. He now has a professional caseworker from the Royal British Legion, the Armed Forces charity. Her summary to me? “Yes, he’s a very difficult case.”
So, what’s the future.? It’s not bright. It’s not orange. When someone is that deep in the rut of late-stage alcoholism combined with borderline personality disorder or sociopathy, there’s little you can do.
- Poor physical health
- Osteoarthritis of both knees
- Estranged from most of his family
- No real, flesh-and blood, friends in his locality
- The kind of personality that means people give you a “wide berth” (his favourite expression)
- Poor hygiene
- Etc etc
Does he actually want to live any more? What are the reasons to live any more? To even get out of bed? Would death be a relief for him?
Choose the action, choose the consequences.
Have a consequential day, won’t you!