Brezhnev Jokes

One Steppe at a Time

Today, as promised: a post devoted to jokes and anecdotes at the expense of the gerontocrat par excellence. I know you’ve been holding your breath.

The Politburo and a smattering of Soviet aerospace scientists are gathered in a large, official room; everyone is very agitated, including Brezhnev. There is much shuffling of paper and hushed conversation as the participants take their seats around the table. Then Brezhnev speaks: “Comrades! The Americans have landed on the moon! This presents a grave threat to Socialism and the peaceful existence of the Soviet Union. We must surpass their achievements – and I have decided how we will do this. Since they have landed on the moon, we will go to the sun!” After a stunned silence, one of the braver scientists raises his hand: “But Comrade Brezhnev, that would be very… hot. Our spacecraft will melt.” Brezhnev turns on the…

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